NAP Negotiations

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NAP Negotiations

Post by Tesseract on Tue Sep 08, 2009 9:18 pm

With the NAP negotiations up in the air, I took it upon myself to ensure the TFP member nearest to me - one Vanad by name - was kept at bay lest I be caught unawares should negotiations shatter completely.

He wrote me (for the first time ever), a single line of text

What happened to the NAP?

Well, this SURELY warranted a response, but I know my duty to the HIVE. If I envenomed my quill too vigorously, it could damage negotiations. But how else CAN I write if not with my own "green ink", as it were?

At last I settled upon this reply. I do hope it meets with the standards we all hold so high. Wink

Dearest Vanad,

You cannot imagine the anguish you have subjected me to with your one simple question. It is a cruelty worthy of... well... me, actually.

I have labored so hard to invigorate the ship production industry on your planets by eliminating – time and time again – the fleets with which you ply your trade in this universe. And when I heard that peace was being negotiated between our leagues, I wept (truly) that I could no longer come and visit my unique maelstrom of destruction upon your quaint mercantile worlds.

And then I received news that negotiations had broken down. I couldn’t – wouldn’t – believe it. And yet our Overminds confirmed it... the NAP has not been ratified! I immediately launched my fleet, knowing you would welcome their cold shadow cast across your cities (so deeply do I hold you in my heart, Vanad).

And now, after so long and so many visits to your world... you write me! I dared to hope that here, at last, would be the rejoicing embrace and the long over-due thanks for all I have suffered and labored on your behalf.

And instead of gratitude I am greeted with a rebuke? You dare strike at me so cruelly with your single question, steeped in the wounded tone of betrayal? You cut me to the quick, sir... a lover could not wound so deeply as you have with your single span of words.

But fear not, dear Vanad, for I am a man of compassion. Though I am baffled by your correspondence, I will not allow it to dissuade me from my cause. I shall soldier on bravely and stay my course, visiting your world again and again and again to stimulate your economy and give your people a reason to build and build again.

So highly do I esteem you, sir.

With Warm Regards,
Tesseract

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Re: NAP Negotiations

Post by Supax Tull on Wed Sep 09, 2009 8:34 am

ROTFLMAO
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Re: NAP Negotiations

Post by MagnusTyrel on Wed Sep 09, 2009 9:10 am

Moar! Moar! i demand Moar! ROFL!

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Re: NAP Negotiations

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